Here’s a funny poem I read and enjoyed quite a bit! Happy Valentine’s Day, All!
My love life has taken a hit.
Nothing I say is important
Unless it’s a byte or a bit.
Everything was just fine;
Now she says we can’t talk
Unless we both go online.
Love is what I feel.”
“That keyword isn’t relevant,”
She said, with eyes of steel.
The screen was all she could see,
And then to my horror and shame,
She started describing me:
Your OS needs help, too.
And you definitely need a big heatsink
To cool your CPU.”
“Not on Valentine’s Day.”
“Fix the bugs, and I’ll see,” she said,
While looking at me with dismay.
Whatever you need; you call it.
I’ll upload or download anything,
And then I’ll go install it.”
And though I don’t want to fight her,
Is this what I want for a Valentine?
I’ve been burned; can I rewrite her?)
“Is there no software in you?
Don’t you remember the good times?
Let our memories see us through.”
“You’re nothing but adware.
“I’ve got four gigs of memory;
I’ve got no problem there.”
“Our love means more than that.”
“That’s not in my cache; we’re going to crash,”
She said, as she turned me down flat.
Do I really want to chase her?
More and more I’m thinking
It might be nice to erase her.)
“Can’t we just plug and play?
I hereby accept default,
And I’m yours, my love, come what may.
I want to be your portal,
But your sudden, distant coldness
Would test the strongest mortal.
So we can FTP,
I’m your go along, get along guy,
And I want you to stay with me.”
And you want to get past my encryption,
If you want to get through my firewall,
Here is my only prescription.”
And e-mail me when it’s done.
I’ll check your page rank with Google,
And tell you if you’re the one.”
Since my Valentine got a computer.
If I want her to care about me again,
I guess I’ll have to reboot her.