relationships

Relationships are a blessing

Relationships are a blessing. Vidya Sury

Just a couple of weeks ago, we had to go somewhere and walked to the corner of our street to get an autorickshaw.  There is a spot where quite a few park in a group.

Usually, they are particular about where they want to go and it is normal for them to refuse a trip. But as we approached the corner, one of the autorickshaw drivers instantly got in the driver’s seat and moved forward beckoning to us. He smiled at me and I recognized him as the guy whose auto we would take when my son was in school.

We got in and started moving towards our destination. He asked me what my son was doing now and inquired about his wellbeing and whether he had adjusted to campus life. I was touched that he’d remember him. By this time we reached our destination and he offered to wait if I intended to return home in a short while.

Grateful, I quickly finished what I had come to do and got back in the auto. He recalled how, when his auto once had a flat tire, I had gifted him a tire and tube. How sweet of him to remember. Then I asked him why he looked exhausted and he told me he had health issues. We kept chatting and when I reached home, he gave me his phone number and said if I had to go anywhere, I was welcome to call him.

You know, most people don’t forget something you did for them.

We are our relationships

And sometimes, we have the privilege of connecting with people who stay in our lives for a long time to come.

I believe I am blessed in my relationships. Even the ones that didn’t work out, because we constantly evolve when we interact with others. Every relationship teaches us something. Also, there’s no rule that we must get along and mesh with everyone we meet in life, right?

Sure, when we first meet everything seems great, partly because both sides are eager to know each other better. When they settle into a pattern, perhaps the interest wanes a bit. The curtain of excitement lifts, the pink glasses are replaced by crystal clear lenses and both now see each other in their true light. If they continue to love what they see, that’s great.  Some people naturally drift apart for various reasons – their life gets in the way and all the good intentions of keeping in touch come to nought. Some just walk away abruptly, and it seems like a dream that they actually got along the way they did.

The most valuable lesson I’ve learned from my relationships is to focus on those who love and care for me and not waste time figuring out why someone doesn’t like me.  With one life to live, and not being a cat, why not pour love and effort into what works for us and make it meaningful?

Relationships are a blessing. Vidya Sury

I cherish the people in my life. This includes my family, my friends, my neighbors, the people in my neighborhood who always have the time to wave or say hello even if they cannot chat, and the strangers I see every day and smile at without actually exchanging words with them. It is the blessing of a friendly presence, a giant hug.

At home, I love the thick bond of unconditional love that binds us strongly, even though we often bicker with each other and are so radically different from each other. We know we can depend on each other, no matter what.

My friends? I adore them.

Just yesterday, when a childhood friend called, we were reminiscing about those school days, the years that followed and musing over where we are, today. It is such a wonderful feeling to be able to pick up the phone and settle into conversation. Even when we talk after months, we simply pick up where we left off. When we are together, even the silence is beautiful. We don’t have to censor our language or our thoughts when we communicate. We don’t have to worry about how our words might be interpreted because they understand the language of our heart.

Why do some relationships work and some fizzle off or turn toxic?

The secret, at least for me, is unconditional love, never keeping score, being non-judgemental, and of course, love, honesty and trust. It is also about being kind and being ready to lift each other up, encouraging one another, rejoicing in each other’s successes and opening our hearts.  It is about having fun together and having each other’s backs, accepting and enjoying our differences, and not trying to change each other.

I like to think I am connected with everyone in this world. After all, we all live under the same sun and moon. My son is always amused at how I strike up a conversation with everyone I meet. I care about everyone. I don’t have to know them to care.

Relationships are a blessing in my life.

This August, we are celebrating blessings month with a theme for each week. Here is last week’s post: When it comes to blessings.

This week’s theme is relationships. How has a relationship blessed you? Join us with your own post and add it to the linky below!

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15 Comments

  • Reply
    Vinodini
    August 14, 2016 at 12:24 pm

    What a positive post! I completely agree with your thoughts, Vidya. We are all connected in someway or the other. Your auto rickshaw episode reminds me of my mum and her easy rapport with auto rickshaw drivers in her area. Some people do have this warm affable personality that draws people to them. You seem to have the same qualities. Lucky you!

  • Reply
    Vishal Bheeroo
    August 14, 2016 at 2:28 pm

    A post filled with blessings, Vidya. It’s so thoughtful of you to help the rickshaw driver and kind of him to recognize u. For sure, it touches the heart. I remember when I came back to India, the shoe polisher on the street recognises me, asking when I came. He was polishing my shoes during the college days. It warms the heart, gave me the feeling that I never went away.
    Vishal Bheeroo recently posted…Friday Fiction: Rock to hellMy Profile

  • Reply
    Rachna Parmar
    August 14, 2016 at 3:55 pm

    Such a lovely post, Vidya. How nice must it be to meet the auto guy who ferried Vidur and remembered him and you. I guess it was your beautiful deed that etched you in his memory. You are right. We can touch people or be touched in an instant. I loved the quote you shared. It is not in our hands to make people like us but it surely is in our hands to only focus on the ones who love us though sometimes the others are a cause of lot of distress. I have been blessed with many beautiful relationships in my life as well.
    Rachna Parmar recently posted…Beautiful Rains and its Ugly Effects on our HomesMy Profile

  • Reply
    Parul Thakur
    August 14, 2016 at 5:31 pm

    Such a lovely post and story about relationships. I believe in these for they affirm that we human are so strong in connections and bonds. Even when there is none of blood.
    You post reminds me of the many hawkers I meet in my area who keep asking how am I doing and what will I want to buy. It’s so cute cos VT thinks how they know me. We mostly step out together but still 😉
    The blessings blog hop is so wonderful – I am marking my calendar for next year.
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  • Reply
    Rajlakshmi
    August 14, 2016 at 8:06 pm

    Relationships are a blessing indeed. And you said it, no keeping scores, no expectations just love can maintain a long lasting relationships. I am close to very few people but I know I can pick my phone and rant my heart out and they will listen. Loved reading about the auto incident, it’s so nice of you to help him in need … the universe reciprocates all the goodness 🙂
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  • Reply
    Kaarina
    August 14, 2016 at 10:47 pm

    Yes they are 🙂 <3
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  • Reply
    Shailaja Vishwanath
    August 14, 2016 at 11:01 pm

    What we take away from each relationship is valuable. My dad always says people come into our lives for a reason, even the ones who stop being there for us. I honestly do not believe in toxic people, just toxic circumstances. One of the biggest things I’ve learnt thanks to depression and social media interactions is to let go of all expectations of every single person, but oneself. Relationships thrive when we nurture them, as you mentioned.
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  • Reply
    Dashy
    August 14, 2016 at 11:26 pm

    Relationships are indeed a blessing, and a fuel tto survive life. There are many who drift off despite being ever so close once upon a time. But earning friends who’d be there for us even when we don’t speak regularly is a true gift. Joining in a linky here for the first time. 🙂
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  • Reply
    My Inner Chick
    August 14, 2016 at 11:55 pm

    OOOOO, what a blessing it would be to live near you, my Vidya. xx
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  • Reply
    Sandra Pawula
    August 15, 2016 at 11:09 pm

    How beautiful, Vidya. This quality seems to come so naturally to you. I’ve always more more shy and introverted but I do care deeply about others in my own way.

  • Reply
    Birgit
    August 16, 2016 at 7:38 pm

    Gosh, you are so right about thinking about the people who love us not the ones who don’t. Too many times we concentrate on the negative and for what? It doesn’t make us feel good, in fact, quite the opposite so why do we do this? What benefit does a person derive from this? If I concentrated on all the people who didn’t care for me I would be one unhappy, frustrated soul. I cherish my relationships and find they nurture not hinder. Some we see every day and others every once in a while and yet more we never meet but we cherish them just as much. It is simply nice to cherish the good.
    Birgit recently posted…Card Crazy! No Not Really…well, MaybeMy Profile

  • Reply
    Elle
    August 17, 2016 at 2:20 am

    It’s awesome that you never meet a stranger Vidya…but always make a friend. I love your take on relationships and I’m a great believer in your practice of sharing love whenever possible, and of course it’s always possible. 🙂

  • Reply
    Mahevash
    August 18, 2016 at 5:03 pm

    Simply lovely 🙂
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  • Reply
    Mahevash
    August 18, 2016 at 5:31 pm

    You’re very welcome 🙂
    Do stop by my blog when you get a mo <3
    Mahevash recently posted…Why Read?My Profile

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