A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary

surgeon As she lay her pet on the table, the vet

pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird’s

chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head

sadly and said, “I’m so sorry, your pet has passed

away.”

The distressed owner wailed, “Are you sure? “Yes, I’m

sure. The duck is dead,” he replied. “How can you be

so sure”, she protested. “I mean, you haven’t done

any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a

coma or something.”

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the

room. He returned a few moments later with a black

Labrador Retriever. As the duck’s owner looked on in

amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his

front paws on the examination table and sniffed the

duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet

with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the

dog and took it out and returned a few moments later

with a beautiful cat. The cat jumped up on the table

and also sniffed the bird from its beak to its tail

and back again. The cat sat back on its haunches,

shook its head, meowed softly, jumped down and

strolled out of the room.

The vet looked at the woman and said, “I’m sorry, but

as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably,

a dead duck.” Then the vet turned to his computer

terminal, hit a few keys, and produced a bill, which

he handed to the woman.

The duck’s owner, still in shock, took the bill.

“$150!” she cried. “$150 just to tell me my duck is

dead?!!”

The vet shrugged. “I’m sorry. If you’d taken my word

for it, the bill would have been $20. But what with

the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it all adds up.”