The Australian Tax Office sends their auditor to a
synagogue. The auditor is doing all the checks,
irritating in the way that only auditors can be, turns
to the Rabbi, and says, “I noticed that you buy a lot
“Yes,” answered the Rabbi.
Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle
drippings?” he asked.
“A good question,” noted the Rabbi. “We actually save
them up and when we have enough, we send them back to
the candle maker and every now and then, they send us
a free box of candles.”
“Oh,” replied the auditor somewhat disappointed that
his unusual question actually had a practical answer.
So he thought he’d go on, in his uniquely obnoxious
“Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do
you do with the crumbs from the matzo?”
“Ah, yes,” replied the Rabbi calmly, “we actually
collect up all the crumbs from the matzo and when we
have enough, we send them in a box back to the
manufacturer and every now and then, they send a whole
box of matzo balls.”
“Oh,” replied the auditor, thinking hard how to
fluster the Rabbi.
“Well, Rabbi,” he went on, “what do you do with all
the foreskins from the circumcisions?”
Cool as a cucumber, “Yes, here too, we do not waste,”
answered the Rabbi.
“What we do is save up all the foreskins, and when we
have enough we send them to the Tax Office, and about
once a year they send us a complete dick like you.”