Just a couple of weeks ago, we had to go somewhere and walked to the corner of our street to get an autorickshaw. There is a spot where quite a few park in a group.
Usually, they are particular about where they want to go and it is normal for them to refuse a trip. But as we approached the corner, one of the autorickshaw drivers instantly got in the driver’s seat and moved forward beckoning to us. He smiled at me and I recognized him as the guy whose auto we would take when my son was in school.
We got in and started moving towards our destination. He asked me what my son was doing now and inquired about his wellbeing and whether he had adjusted to campus life. I was touched that he’d remember him. By this time we reached our destination and he offered to wait if I intended to return home in a short while.
Grateful, I quickly finished what I had come to do and got back in the auto. He recalled how, when his auto once had a flat tire, I had gifted him a tire and tube. How sweet of him to remember. Then I asked him why he looked exhausted and he told me he had health issues. We kept chatting and when I reached home, he gave me his phone number and said if I had to go anywhere, I was welcome to call him.
You know, most people don’t forget something you did for them.
We are our relationships
And sometimes, we have the privilege of connecting with people who stay in our lives for a long time to come.
I believe I am blessed in my relationships. Even the ones that didn’t work out, because we constantly evolve when we interact with others. Every relationship teaches us something. Also, there’s no rule that we must get along and mesh with everyone we meet in life, right?
Sure, when we first meet everything seems great, partly because both sides are eager to know each other better. When they settle into a pattern, perhaps the interest wanes a bit. The curtain of excitement lifts, the pink glasses are replaced by crystal clear lenses and both now see each other in their true light. If they continue to love what they see, that’s great. Some people naturally drift apart for various reasons – their life gets in the way and all the good intentions of keeping in touch come to nought. Some just walk away abruptly, and it seems like a dream that they actually got along the way they did.
The most valuable lesson I’ve learned from my relationships is to focus on those who love and care for me and not waste time figuring out why someone doesn’t like me. With one life to live, and not being a cat, why not pour love and effort into what works for us and make it meaningful?
I cherish the people in my life. This includes my family, my friends, my neighbors, the people in my neighborhood who always have the time to wave or say hello even if they cannot chat, and the strangers I see every day and smile at without actually exchanging words with them. It is the blessing of a friendly presence, a giant hug.
At home, I love the thick bond of unconditional love that binds us strongly, even though we often bicker with each other and are so radically different from each other. We know we can depend on each other, no matter what.
My friends? I adore them.
Just yesterday, when a childhood friend called, we were reminiscing about those school days, the years that followed and musing over where we are, today. It is such a wonderful feeling to be able to pick up the phone and settle into conversation. Even when we talk after months, we simply pick up where we left off. When we are together, even the silence is beautiful. We don’t have to censor our language or our thoughts when we communicate. We don’t have to worry about how our words might be interpreted because they understand the language of our heart.
Why do some relationships work and some fizzle off or turn toxic?
The secret, at least for me, is unconditional love, never keeping score, being non-judgemental, and of course, love, honesty and trust. It is also about being kind and being ready to lift each other up, encouraging one another, rejoicing in each other’s successes and opening our hearts. It is about having fun together and having each other’s backs, accepting and enjoying our differences, and not trying to change each other.
I like to think I am connected with everyone in this world. After all, we all live under the same sun and moon. My son is always amused at how I strike up a conversation with everyone I meet. I care about everyone. I don’t have to know them to care.
Relationships are a blessing in my life.
This August, we are celebrating blessings month with a theme for each week. Here is last week’s post: When it comes to blessings.
This week’s theme is relationships. How has a relationship blessed you? Join us with your own post and add it to the linky below!