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by Vidya Sury April 14, 2015 8 comments
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Dear Vidur,

As long as we live, we learn. And it is a good thing too, isn’t it? Life would be boring if learning had to stop. I am always amazed how we’re exposed to something new almost every day. For example, today, I learned that I could actually scroll through the image gallery on my cellphone – you know, the one I have been using for five years. I can’t believe I always went back and forth between images. Ah well. Knowledge can come from anywhere – noticing a new facet of an everyday thing (and feeling somewhat sheepish), receiving a piece of wisdom from someone we meet, or from a book.

One of the hardest things to learn is self-love – we get so caught up with our life we fail to recognize our own potential.

Today I’d like to share a wonderful book with you titled “The End of Self-Help – Discovering peace and happiness right at the heart of your messy, scary, brilliant life” by Dr.Gail Brenner, which will be available to order on Amazon from April 16, its publication date.

I was intrigued by the title of the book when Gail emailed me with a copy (thank you Gail!) and couldn’t wait to read it. When I started reading it, I couldn’t help the feeling of joy at discovering that this book resonated strongly with my belief, which is – we are enough, we are perfect as we are, and we only have to look within to know it. The main message to learn from the book is that pain is inevitable but suffering is optional, simply because we have the power of choice. Peace is within easy reach.

I wondered why she called the book “the end of self-help”, and found the the answer in her welcome message:”because there’s nothing to be fixed, no damaged or inadequate self that needs help. The happiness you seek is already here, waiting for your loving attention. Live it!”

So let me tell you about the book.

The End of Self-Help – Discovering peace and happiness right at the heart of your messy, scary, brilliant life
by Dr.Gail Brenner

Learn vidya sury book review

Gail starts the book with her own story where she discovers the secret to happiness. She urges the reader to look within to explore what keeps them from being happy and goes on to explain the role of attention, thoughts and emotions in our quest for peace. Self-awareness brings happiness. She encourages the reader to find their real self and offers a “how-to” plan in the chapters that follow. One of the things I loved about the book is the “exploration” exercises at the end of each chapter with a link to the guided audio meditation on her site.

The book dissects what drives our actions and thoughts, why we live in fear and how to overcome it. It takes a fresh approach to viewing relationships. The final chapter leads in to authentic, flexible living without feeling the need to pretend or worry.

The end of self-help is all about self-realization, understanding our relationship with ourselves and others, and recognizing our power of choice in our response to life.

Remember how, when you learn to navigate road traffic you come across “stop, look, proceed”? That slogan holds good for paving our path to our own happiness and peace.

“The realization of your true nature ends self-help or personal development. Why? Because there is no self to help or person to develop” Gail Brenner

The main takeaways from the book are:

  • Learn to live mindfully
  • Learn to let go
  • Learn not to limit yourself
  • Learn to look through the eyes of awareness
  • Learn to be self-motivated
  • Learn to look within
  • Learn to tap into your infinite potential
  • Learn to open yourself up and be spontaneous
  • Learn to laugh
  • Learn to experience peace
  • Learn not to rely on others for your happiness
  • Learn to send your inner critic on a permanent vacation
  • Learn not to sweat the small stuff
  • Learn to enjoy the freedom that comes with being flexible and fearless

My wise Grandmother constantly said – we are complete. We just need the courage to know ourselves. I think Gail Brenner’s book is a valuable guide that explains how to do this.

“The Happiness you seek is already here” Gail Brenner

Stand on the shoulders of giants, Vidur. I encourage you to read this book! The best part is, you don’t have to finish it in one sitting, as even individual chapters are nuggets of wisdom to enrich you.

Live. Learn. Enjoy life.

Love and hugs,

Blessed to be your Mom

About the author, Dr. Gail Brenner

Gail Brenner The End of Self HelpGail Brenner, Ph.D. is a psychologist who joyfully shares insights about discovering that suffering is optional. She is the author of, “The End of Self-Help: Discovering Peace and Happiness Right at the Heart of Your Messy, Scary, Brilliant Life.” Find Gail on Facebook, Twitter, and at her blog, GailBrenner.com, where she offers articles, conversation, and a free ebook. Her work offers a bridge between psychology and spiritual understanding and brings clear seeing and compassion to everyday human challenges.

Buy her book on Amazon.




A to Z Challenge 2015

L for Learn

L for Laugh at Life Hacks For Happiness

L for Lifestyle tip at Life Hacks For Diabetics


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Darla M Sands April 15, 2015 at 10:58 pm

As if you posts are not delightful enough, you have the most gorgeous graphics at the top of each. I look forward to what each day will bring. Best wishes! Oh, and my blog is number 1271 on the A to Z list today.
Darla M Sands recently posted…M is for Marilyn Manson – Music to My Ears

Vidya Sury April 16, 2015 at 9:47 am

Oooh Darla! My heart is singing…thanks so much for noticing. I love creating those graphics 😀
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My Inner Chick April 16, 2015 at 4:02 am

–I love your words, perspective, & HEART! <3 xxxxx
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Vidya Sury April 17, 2015 at 10:02 am

Love you right back, Kim! ♥
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Marie April 16, 2015 at 6:55 pm

This looks like the kind of book for me right now Vidya. Yes we do learn every day. But knowing ourself is a day-to-day practice. It’s worth it.
Looking forward getting it.
Stay well.
Marie recently posted…I talk about the Terrible Twos @ Muslim Mummy!

Vidya Sury April 17, 2015 at 10:04 am

Thank you dear Marie! I read the book in one sitting – Gail is a wonderful absolutely no-fluff writer! I loved how she got to the point with zero beating around the bush. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!
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Birgit April 17, 2015 at 7:18 am

What a positive and enlightening book. I will mark this down. It sounds so simple but it is one of the hardest things to do especially when we are faced with difficulties. We seem to go in negative thinking which only hinders our growth. We need to always reinforce the positive
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Vidya Sury April 17, 2015 at 9:51 am

It was a great read, Birgit. I loved the message that we can spiritually heal ourselves – we have all the ingredients inbuilt! Thank you!
Vidya Sury recently posted…Nourish


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