Home Reflections Postponing Joy

Postponing Joy

by Vidya Sury January 3, 2013 27 comments

Yes. I had to.

You see, here I was, counting down to Jan 1, 2013, going 5, 4, 3, 2…..and 1….and…0….and here I was, already in 2013 while most of my friends were still enjoying the last few hours of 2012. I went to bed happily, imagining all sorts of things to do on Jan 2013.  I woke up, refreshed, even though I only slept about four and a half hours. I lit the lamp, offered fruit and a cup of milk with sugar (I somehow suspect God likes sugar in her milk) and stood in my little prayer room, smiling, thinking of you all, my dear friends and inhaling the gentle scent of the jasmine flowers I had bought the previous day.

As I wished everyone a glorious year ahead in my heart and then made my specific requests on behalf of my friends to God (yes, remember that hotline I have?), my thoughts transitioned to what I would do on this beautiful day. I decided to make a special sweet. I had lots of milk in the fridge and so, decided to make a sweet from it. It involved boiling two liters of milk down to reduce it to a thick sweet fudge flavored with cardamom.  Then I wanted to make a chocolate cake.

I began the day in the kitchen, making the coffee lovingly and I visualized all of us sitting together, in a few minutes to enjoy it and share jokes and news. We did. Sury had a working day as he was invited to give a talk at IIIT and soon, he got ready and left. Vidur and I got on with our day. We decided to have pasta for lunch with a mix of cottage cheese+vegetable side-dish which is very very yummy.

I wanted to write a post on New Year’s day, but thought I would postpone the joy to later in the afternoon. The milk sweet takes a couple of hours to make, so I thought I would get that and the cake going. Both came out fabulously and I fondly thought, hopefully both would last as long as it took me to make them. Laughing to myself, I then cooked lunch. Yes, when I plan to make a sweet, I always do it first because I don’t want the smell of onions or garlic to permeate into it as I make lunch.  After lunch, we divided the remaining chores like washing up in the kitchen, and washing clothes between us and decided to regroup in two hours.

Around 3 pm, we were done – pleasantly full from lunch and satisfied with tackling all that we had planned for the day. We settled down to work – Vidur to do his quota of holiday homework and I, to take of the various things I do when I sit at the comp. We got the music on to motivate us.

Vidya Sury Joy

And then it happened

The phone rang.

It was my uncle.

He called to inform us that my aunt, who had been rushed to hospital following a severe stroke and surgery who was in and out of a coma for three months, had passed away at 2.30 pm. Remember I wrote in an older post about this aunt being in a coma? Oh, the sadness! She was my Mom’s sister and one of nine siblings. Now, my Uncle is the only survivor and that makes me so infinitely sad. We are a close family although we have our differences. We have discussions, not arguments.  I may have lacked a father in my life, but I was rewarded manifold by the love of my uncles and aunts.  My heart feels so heavy.

Enter Joy

I was  not going to do the “year in review” or “resolutions” sort of post anyway.  But I certainly want to share a beautiful ebook with you ” A Power Prism: Reflections of Source.” I had the privilege of being invited to contribute to it.

This one-of-a-kind ebook is a collaborative effort by the members of the Facets of Joy community and orchestrated by my dear friend, the lovely Joy Holland, who has the talent for original ideas. She decided, in November, to invite her community to collaborate on an ebook she planned to launch on January 1, as a gift to the world.  She asked each of us two questions:

May you share with us a bit about what would you consider is the source of your power? And, what practices do you currently use to cultivate that power?




When doubt surfaces (does doubt surface?) what resources do you rely upon as you continue to create?

She then curated the responses, weaving energetic applications and affirmations with her beautiful photography through the book. The result: our first ever Facets of Joy community ebook.

I am grateful to Joy for including me in this book. I am proud to be a part of it.  Please head over to Facets of Joy to download it for free.

A Power Prism Facets of Joy It is a beautiful book with some fantastic contributions from wonderful people.  I was actually going to write a separate joy – filled post to announce this book. But somehow it feels appropriate in this post, because I need strength right now when my heart hurts. Sometimes I wonder how we just move on with life, doing the usual things when our heart is weighed down with sadness.  I guess the routine and the physical activity help take the edge off.

Life will go on.

As far as I am concerned, every year has losses and gains. At the end of the day, or year, I like to think that the gains far outweigh the losses, especially if we pay attention to the little things – because they all add up. Yes, they do.

I am still making my list of things to do in 2013.

Yes. No resolutions.

Only resolve and action.

Loving and giving. Growing.

If you think I can help you in any way,  just let me know. Email me.

And promise me that you will:

Joy and Inspiration

I am so grateful for your support, as always. Happy 2013.

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Aditya January 3, 2013 at 6:58 pm

Mesmerizing. As I was reading this, you play the scenes in my mind with your words.

I was glad that you began your day on a happy note and things were fine until you were informed about the sad news. I’m honestly praying for peace for you and your family.

However, like you say, it’s the little ones that add up and the joy of releasing the ebook on new year’s day couldn’t have been more. I’ve already downloaded my copy and hoping to finish it soon.

A very happy new year to you 🙂 The picture at the end was superb, inspiring!

Aditya recently posted…What Are Your New Year Resolutions?

Joy January 3, 2013 at 9:09 pm


Thank you…my heart feels the celebration and the pain…

We plant the seeds of love, and we wonder (I wonder) do they blossom, and how…yet we keep planting, even through doubt and pain. They blossom fully and allow us the gift of the fragrance and color and beauty…

At the end of your article, you asked for us to promise…well I promise two things:
1. I will be Love. Unconditional.
2. With every fiber of my being, I know we cannot lose someone we love; their energy is interwoven through each celestial display and infuses all that we continue to create as we connect and move through World. (*grin* I didn’t just read that somewhere, I live it, so you can trust the truth of it).

Thank you for your presence, for who you are, and all that you share with World.
Joy recently posted…Every Breath is a New Beginning

Angela Artemis|Powered by Intuition January 3, 2013 at 11:43 pm

I’m so sorry about your mother’s sister. I know how you are feel. I’m sending you love and healing.
Angela Artemis|Powered by Intuition recently posted…Near Death Experiences and Spiritual Transformation

Elle January 4, 2013 at 1:59 am

I’m sorry for your loss and the sadness that it brings Vidya.

You’ve written a wonderful post, filled with the joys and sorrows of life. And yes my dear friend I will be as loving and giving as I possibly can. Please continue to bring your love and light into the world for no one does it quite like you.

Love Elle
Elle recently posted…What Does It Take To Have The Life You Want?

Lori Gosselin January 3, 2013 at 8:36 pm

Aw Vidz! I’m so sorry for your loss! I followed you as you made your coffee, the mild sweet and the cake and my heart fell with yours when you got the phone call. “Sometimes I wonder how we just move on with life, doing the usual things when our heart is weighed down with sadness” Yet we do, Vidya, we do and we know we can even though at times we forget.
I’m going to pick up a copy of the book – congratulations – I’m sure your contribution makes it worth the read all on its own.
Lori Gosselin recently posted…Five Empowering Words for 2013

MamaTim January 4, 2013 at 2:06 am

Dear Vidya. So sorry to hear of the passing. My condolence to the family. Hugs..
MamaTim recently posted…The Last for 2012

Rahul January 4, 2013 at 4:13 am

A perfect start to a New Year! Best wishes Vidya, to you and your family for a joyous New Year:)

Jodi Chapman January 4, 2013 at 6:36 am

Dearest Vidya,
I’m so sorry about your aunt. Please know that I am sending you and your family love and hugs. My heart goes out to all of you. XOXO
Jodi Chapman recently posted…Happy 2013! Free Soul Clarity Message!

Julie | A Clear Sign January 4, 2013 at 12:33 pm

Vidya, Sending you love for your loss.

I can just see you there, cooking, taking a moment of peace, sending blessings to your friends. I can’t tell you how glad I am to know you are out there, somewhere in the world. It just makes my heart happy.

P.S. I had not smiled today until I saw your question,”Did you smile today?” I even laughed.
Julie | A Clear Sign recently posted…Begin As You Mean To Go On

Glynis Jolly January 4, 2013 at 3:13 pm

I am sad about your lose, Viyda. At least now, your aunt is free from the devastation of the stroke. I do not know what your beliefs are, however, I had read and do believe that Death is just an horizon that we are not able to look beyond.

Vishnu January 4, 2013 at 4:39 pm

Vidya – condolences to you and your family. When death and sadness strikes in unexpected times, like new years day, we realize the transiency of all things in our life. And why we should really appreciate and savor every moment of every day.

Thank you for mentioning the book which I’m looking forward to reading.

Kaarina Dillabough January 4, 2013 at 2:10 pm

My thoughts and prayers are with you, my friend.
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Cathy Taughinbaugh January 4, 2013 at 8:41 pm

Wishing you all the best in 2013. Your loving words have touched many!!

Jodi @ Heal Now January 4, 2013 at 3:43 pm

Vidya, I am sorry for your loss. I lost a friend last week, and can think of barely much but so I know how you might be feeling. Hats off to the book. what a lovely concept. I will head over to get mine!
Jodi @ Heal Now recently posted…Prayer of St Francis Words to Live By

Jack January 4, 2013 at 7:42 pm

I am sorry for your loss.

I loved this:

I am still making my list of things to do in 2013.

Yes. No resolutions.

Only resolve and action.

Makes so much sense to me.
Jack recently posted…One Big Reason Not To Waste Time

Sandi Amorim January 5, 2013 at 3:47 pm

Sorry for your loss dear Vidya, but moved by the beauty of your thoughts.

“Only resolve and action.” …taking these words as they resonate deeply.
Sandi Amorim recently posted…Meditate Right Now

Mayura January 5, 2013 at 3:58 pm

Hi Vidya,

I was enjoying the music with you AND then I read about your loss. I’m very sorry for your loss Vidya. Things keep reminding us about the uncertainity of our lives and we can’t take anything with us when we go, but leave love in the hearts of loved ones.

Life with all ups and downs, we area heading there too 🙂 No point of thinking about end, but live the moments and helping each others. You are very true that people tend not to enjoy small moments and feel life is just filled with pain and sorrows with their busy lives.

I know you accept the unbearable moments ’cause it’s life. But they are so sad. I know you are courageous dear 🙂

Ah… Congratulations for being part of the eBook dear. That’s really cool 🙂 I really belive in collaboration. See how we all help the World even a single word.

Wishing you a Happy, Healthy and Prosporous New Year with much more success on your way Vidya 🙂 Let’s give more to this World and be richer than ever 🙂

Mayura recently posted…Monitor and Manage Multiple Social Media Accounts with HootSuite

Terri Sonoda January 5, 2013 at 7:33 pm

Oh Vidya, my condolences for the loss of your Aunt. I am happy to hear, however, that you have found peace in your heart.

And, yes…..I promise!

Love you,
Terri Sonoda recently posted…Monday Listicles – Crushed

Rum Punch Drunk January 5, 2013 at 4:25 pm

I am sorry for you loss and I’m sure your aunt will be sadly missed by you and your family.

For some it has been a joyous time entering a New Year with great expectations and for others there has been loss and grief. This is the third time within a matter of days I am hearing of someone losing a loved one at this time. Focus on the good memories that you will have in your heart forever and stay close to your family who are also feeling the pain.

Resolve and Action
Loving and Giving is the way to go for 2013. Great ideas.
Rum Punch Drunk recently posted…Legacy

My Inner Chick January 6, 2013 at 12:18 am

so sorry, dear, to hear about your aunt.
Thank God we will see all of our loved ones again. This is what keeps me moving forward.
I love you more than 7 golden tigers drinking water from Kenya’s Lake Victoria. Xxxxx
My Inner Chick recently posted…Blogging Out Loud

Carolyn Hughes January 6, 2013 at 1:00 pm

Vidya I’m joining you in No Resolutions, just ‘resolve and action.’
What a positive way to start a new year 🙂
Carolyn Hughes recently posted…Time to say goodbye.

Unknown Mami January 6, 2013 at 6:37 pm

Reading about your aunt hit me quickly and painfully in the heart. I am so sorry for your loss.
Unknown Mami recently posted…Women’s Building (Sundays In My City)

Ken Wert@MeanttobeHappy January 7, 2013 at 4:47 am

You and your family are in my heart and prayers, Vidya. And yes, life does go on. It goes on in the memory of those who have been touched and in the memory of those who loved. It goes on as a shared experience. It goes on as a reflection of the divine. It goes on as an eternal shift, a celestial change of address (whatever that may mean to whoever reads it). With heaps of love, my dear friend.

I look forward to read all about your resolve and action, loving, giving and growing throughout 2013!
Ken Wert@MeanttobeHappy recently posted…The Brick and Mortar of your Life (goal setting where it counts the most)

Betsy/Zen Mama January 7, 2013 at 1:29 am

Happy New Year Vidya! Looking forward to catching up with you!

pepperfry coupons January 7, 2013 at 9:29 am

Great blog. All posts have something to learn. Your work is very good and i appreciate you and hopping for some more informative posts.

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Debbie January 7, 2013 at 4:23 pm

Sorry about your Loss, Vidya. I do understand. I had no grandparents, but the Uncles and Aunts in my life were wonderful. I only have 1 Aunt left out of many.

I know that the others are looking down on me and it eases the pain to know that i will see them again.

Wishing you a wonderful New Year and i promise to keep up the loving and giving, because that is what life is all about.
Thanks for sharing,

Shalu Sharma January 9, 2013 at 1:32 pm

All I can say is that I am sorry for your loss. Sometimes I wonder why we human have to suffer like this. Take care.
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