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Nurtured by Encouragement

by Vidya Sury September 26, 2013 11 comments

“There is nothing better than the encouragement of a good friend.”
Katharine Butler Hathaway

The year was 1992. The organization I worked with had just transferred me to another branch. Suddenly from being in familiar surroundings, I was in a strange place. My enthusiasm waned. I worked as a salesperson and I hated asking directions all the time. Everything seemed like too much work – I was spending more time on trivial stuff and by the time I was face to face with my customer, I was tired. I wasn’t happy at the end of the day. Things improved, as it is usually the fear of the unknown that drags us down.

As the days went by, my supportive colleagues encouraged me. During this time, I met a placement consultant who was visiting our office and from the moment we shook hands, it was instant friendship. A few weeks of interaction convinced her I was meant to be a Trainer. She pushed me to attend an interview in a large organization. Just to humor her, I did. And got the job. While my immediate boss wasn’t the happiest person on earth, his boss was, and encouraged me to move on.  I did. At 8 times the salary I was currently earning. If she had not encouraged me to stretch out of my comfort zone, I might not have found my new comfort zone!

As we go through life, we are fueled by encouragement to achieve the things we aspire for.

We live by encouragement and die without it – slowly, sadly and angrily. Celeste Holm

At various stages in my life, it was the encouragement I received – from my Mom, my Grandmother, my family, my friends and peers – that motivated me to become mentally strong. It helped me move closer to my potential and cope with the challenges I faced. I learned from my experiences rather than get disheartened by them.

I am a positive person, but I too have my moments.  But the reinforcement that I received gave me a realistic view of myself. I saw myself as adequate and didn’t beat myself up so much when I did not get the result I expected. So maybe I set myself high standards, but my folks simply admired me for it and that alone was encouragement to keep on keeping on.  I am open minded, open to new experiences and am not scared of making mistakes. In life, the path of learning is sprinkled with opportunities, disguised as mistakes.

“A word of encouragement during a failure is worth more than an hour of praise after success.” – Unknown

I have learned from my Mom that the language of encouragement is different from the usual.  She would say:

“I think you can do it.” not “Let me do that for you”
“You have what it takes.” not “Be very careful.”
“What do you think?” not “Let me give you some advice”
“I could use your help.” not “You can’t do this”
“It looks like a problem occurred.
What can we do to solve the problem?” not “I told you to be careful!”
“I know you did your best.” not “Too bad that didn’t work”

Correction does much, but encouragement does more.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Encouragement nurtures. Stimulates. Recognizes. Accepts. Appreciates. Focuses on Strengths.

So when my soul sister Elle Sommer of Reflecting A Life invited to guest post as the encourager of the month on her blog, I wrote about encouragement. Because Elle encourages and motivates on a daily basis.

The post is titled “The Power of Encouraging Words. The gift that keeps on giving”

I would be honored if you would come over and read it – and share your story/views.

At the end of that post, I’ve invited readers to answer the following question and share the answer with me via email.

Can you think of a time when someone’s words changed the course of your life? Or have your words made a difference in someone’s actions or life? If not, find someone and encourage them this week.


Share your experience with me via email (vidya at vidyasury dot com) and I’ll feature it on my blog in a post.

Thank you for always encouraging me with your presence.

With love,


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Proactive Indian September 27, 2013 at 8:02 am

I read your post on Elle’s blog and have commented on it.
I’ll share an experience with you by email. Any restrictions on number of words, etc.?
Proactive Indian recently posted…Put your money where your mouth is!

Vidya Sury September 27, 2013 at 9:45 am

No restrictions at all, Pro. 🙂 Although, if you make it into a long enough story, I’ll quietly feature it as a guest post 😉
Vidya Sury recently posted…An Award, Tears and Gratitude

Kalpana Solsi September 28, 2013 at 12:29 am

Motivation can move mountains while a word of discouragement sets one back. I have read that if you cannot say a good word , do not open your mouth. At times I feel it is right.

Lisa @ Grandma's Briefs September 28, 2013 at 2:59 am

So true. The way things are phrased can make all the difference between empowering a child or taking away their power. Thank you for the reminder!
Lisa @ Grandma’s Briefs recently posted…Grandma’s grand impression

Kajal Kapur September 28, 2013 at 7:34 am

We love coming back here for more. This is one place where i always get an answer, Vidya. A few days ago, I wrote a story to the effect of how ‘encouragement’ can really change the course of a person’s life. Hope you read it too 🙂

(Marked below: Take A Leap)

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My Inner Chick September 28, 2013 at 9:38 am

***Thank you for always encouraging me with your presence, Vidya****

With love,

Kim Xxxxx
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Carmen's Chronicles September 28, 2013 at 10:08 am

This was a wonderful post, Vidya. From their earliest years, children need encouragement. Sometimes, in the course of parenting, we forget that and scold rather than encourage.
Carmen’s Chronicles recently posted…Friday Flash 55 – Help! – September 27 ( in India ), 2013

Vishnu September 28, 2013 at 11:26 am

Yes!! Like MIC mentioned above, thank you for your inspiration and encouragement here on the blog Vidya. Going to check out your post on Elle’s site. YOur Mom not only spoke the language of encouragement but a language of love and wisdom!
Vishnu recently posted…Controlling Manipulative Relationships: The End of An Era

Suzy September 28, 2013 at 1:28 pm

Dropped by your post at Elle’s. Definitely encourage your children, but don’t let them get complacent that no matter what they do, they’ll only get encouragement. Unfortunately the world doesn’t work like that and kids need to grow up to be confident adults that understand consequences of actions. But by all means love and encourage them to be better than they think they can be. Inspiring post.
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Fran Sorin September 28, 2013 at 5:02 pm


As I re-read your post this morning, I an once again struck by the amount of inspiration,encouragement, and love you are sending to your readers~ thank you~ xxoo-Fran
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Encouraging Quotes For Various Situations - Everyday Gyaan April 5, 2014 at 7:22 am

[…] experience of life will tell us that encouragement is truly the oxygen of the soul! I decided to put together some of the quotes I’ve come across over the years that I found […]


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