“I am good enough” is one of my mantras. But I didn’t adopt it overnight. I was lucky to have a mentor in my Mother, who was full of positive inspiration. Yet, there were times I felt I wasn’t good enough. Some sort of fear would make me hold back…preventing me from being my best self. Outside of those situations, though, I would laugh at myself for thinking I didn’t measure up…you know what I mean.
At times, we are so accomplished at allowing limiting beliefs to grip us and making us doubt our abilities. From time to time, I need that strong dose of inspiration, and to hear the right words that will lift me up. And one of my favorite sources over the last three years is my dear friend, Tess Marshall, the founder of The Bold Life, where she blogs and inspires people to do great things.
Six months ago, when she launched her 30 days to bold course, I was thrilled to interview her right here, where she shared her own story and spoke about making fear your friend. This course has helped over 1000 people be bold!
Today, I am once again delighted to have her here, this time with a guest post that spoke directly to my heart. I am going through some tough times now and took strength from reading it.
Overcome Self-doubt: You Are Good Enough
by Tess Marshall
“At its root, perfectionism isn’t really about a deep love of being meticulous. It’s about fear. Fear of making a mistake. Fear of disappointing others. Fear of failure. Fear of success.” ~ Michael Law
Limiting self-beliefs haunt us all more often than we’d like to admit. We beat ourselves up and cause our own pain by focusing on what we don’t get right, what we’re not a part of and what we think we’re lacking.
We compare our weaknesses to the strengths of others. We put others up and ourselves down. We torture ourselves with our own expectations, demands and fears.
The mental chatter we all know too well goes something like this:
I’m not good enough.
I’m not smart enough.
I’m too young.
I don’t have enough experience.
I don’t have a degree.
I’m too old.
Nobody loves me.
It’s just too late.
This negative self-talk is painful, exhausting and immobilizing. You may have had a tough childhood. You may have suffered abuse. But today you may be your own worst enemy.
There will always be someone smarter than you, quicker than you or more creative than you. There will always be someone that does more, sells more and has more than you. So what?
Stop the pity party. Life doesn’t have to be a struggle.
You don’t have to:
You don’t have to be the best.
You don’t have to have the best.
You don’t have to focus on what you lack.
You don’t have to get it right all the time.
You don’t have to complain and compete.
You don’t have to live someone else’s dream.
You don’t have to be an overnight success.
You don’t need to be someone special or do something epic.
You don’t have to be in a relationship.
You don’t have to be mean to yourself.
The world won’t come to an end because you’re not perfect.
Because you are good enough.
The elbow grease you put into your dream today—it’s good enough.
The creativity you put into the project you created—it’s good enough.
The love you put into your relationships—it’s good enough.
The attempt you made to get the job done—it’s good enough.
The first crack you took trying to learn something new—it’s good enough.
The person you are and the difference you make—it’s good enough.
Give yourself credit for what you did. Celebrate it.
And keep growing:
- Be authentic and hold yourself accountable.
- Dive in and bring passion to the table.
- Use your amazing talents, abilities and knowledge.
- Take action, work real hard and get stuff done.
- Build confidence and perseverance.
- Collaborate and create partnerships.
- Breathe, take a break and begin, again.
- Keep growing and learning new skills.
- Love yourself and feed your soul.
- Love and serve others.
- Appreciate and celebrate life.
Life goes on one day at a time, no matter what you believe or choose to do. When you release your self-critical and perfectionistic patterns, you gain the confidence and motivation to go further in life than you ever thought possible.
If you need support and guidance to follow your dream or live your best life, you don’t have to journey alone.
Thank you, Tess!
Tess Marshall, Courage Coach and the founder of The Bold Life.
Overcome self-doubt and take action to live the life of your dreams.
Let’s face it, folks. Life doesn’t change much unless you decide to change it. Once you decide, really decide, there’s no going back. You craft a plan and take action. Sometimes your action will be in the form of small steps. Sometimes you’ll leap. As long as you’re consistent, it doesn’t matter. You just keep taking action.