Home Inspiration You Are Good Enough. Overcome Self-doubt

You Are Good Enough. Overcome Self-doubt

by Vidya Sury June 12, 2013 32 comments
I am good enough Vidya Sury

I am good enough” is one of my mantras. But I didn’t adopt it overnight. I was lucky to have a mentor in my Mother, who was full of positive inspiration. Yet, there were times I felt I wasn’t good enough. Some sort of fear would make me hold back…preventing me from being my best self. Outside of those situations, though, I would laugh at myself for thinking I didn’t measure up…you know what I  mean.

At times, we are so accomplished at allowing limiting beliefs to grip us and making us doubt our abilities.  From time to time, I need that strong dose of inspiration, and to hear the right words that will lift me up.  And one of my favorite sources over the last three years is my dear friend, Tess Marshall, the founder of The Bold Life, where she blogs and inspires people to do great things.

Six months ago, when she launched her 30 days to bold course, I was thrilled to interview her right here, where she shared her own story and spoke about making fear your friend. This course has helped over 1000 people be bold!

Today, I am once again delighted to have her here, this time with a guest post that spoke directly to my heart.  I am going through some tough times now and took strength from reading it.

you are good enough

Tess with her adorable grandson

Welcome, Tess!

Overcome Self-doubt: You Are Good Enough

by Tess Marshall

“At its root, perfectionism isn’t really about a deep love of being meticulous. It’s about fear. Fear of making a mistake. Fear of disappointing others. Fear of failure. Fear of success.” ~ Michael Law

Limiting self-beliefs haunt us all more often than we’d like to admit. We beat ourselves up and cause our own pain by focusing on what we don’t get right, what we’re not a part of and what we think we’re lacking.

We compare our weaknesses to the strengths of others. We put others up and ourselves down. We torture ourselves with our own expectations, demands and fears.

The mental chatter we all know too well goes something like this:

I’m not good enough.

I’m not smart enough.

I’m too young.

I don’t have enough experience.

I don’t have a degree.

I’m too old.

Nobody loves me.

It’s just too late.

This negative self-talk is painful, exhausting and immobilizing. You may have had a tough childhood. You may have suffered abuse. But today you may be your own worst enemy.

There will always be someone smarter than you, quicker than you or more creative than you. There will always be someone that does more, sells more and has more than you. So what?

Stop the pity party. Life doesn’t have to be a struggle.

You don’t have to:

You don’t have to be the best.
You don’t have to have the best.
You don’t have to focus on what you lack.
You don’t have to get it right all the time.
You don’t have to complain and compete.
You don’t have to live someone else’s dream.
You don’t have to be an overnight success.
You don’t need to be someone special or do something epic.
You don’t have to be in a relationship.
You don’t have to be mean to yourself.
The world won’t come to an end because you’re not perfect.

Because you are good enough.

The elbow grease you put into your dream today—it’s good enough.

The creativity you put into the project you created—it’s good enough.

The love you put into your relationships—it’s good enough.

The attempt you made to get the job done—it’s good enough.

The first crack you took trying to learn something new—it’s good enough.

The person you are and the difference you make—it’s good enough.

Give yourself credit for what you did. Celebrate it.

And keep growing:

  • Be authentic and hold yourself accountable.
  • Dive in and bring passion to the table.
  • Use your amazing talents, abilities and knowledge.
  • Take action, work real hard and get stuff done.
  • Build confidence and perseverance.
  • Collaborate and create partnerships.
  • Breathe, take a break and begin, again.
  • Keep growing and learning new skills.
  • Love yourself and feed your soul.
  • Love and serve others.
  • Appreciate and celebrate life.

Life goes on one day at a time, no matter what you believe or choose to do. When you release your self-critical and perfectionistic patterns, you gain the confidence and motivation to go further in life than you ever thought possible.

If you need support and guidance to follow your dream or live your best life, you don’t have to journey alone.

Thank you, Tess!

30 days of bold you are enough

Tess Marshall, Courage Coach and the founder of The Bold Life.

Overcome self-doubt and take action to live the life of your dreams.

30 days of bold you are good enough

Let’s face it, folks. Life doesn’t change much unless you decide to change it. Once you decide, really decide, there’s no going back. You craft a plan and take action. Sometimes your action will be in the form of small steps. Sometimes you’ll leap. As long as you’re consistent, it doesn’t matter. You just keep taking action.

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Tess The Bold Life June 12, 2013 at 7:52 pm


Thanks so much for you love, kindness and support. Please let me know how I can help with anything you’re going through. xo

Vidya Sury June 13, 2013 at 9:07 am

🙂 You already have, with your words, Tess. 🙂 I am privileged to have you here. Hugs!
Vidya Sury recently posted…You Are Good Enough. Overcome Self-doubt

Anyta June 14, 2013 at 6:49 am

Thank you Vidya. This is exactly what I needed to be reminded of. I can look at my life’s present challenge differently, flip the fear and validate myself for what I have done well so far.

Debbie June 12, 2013 at 9:56 pm

Hi Tess and thanks Vidya for having her. Yes, I can say i have taken this course, ’30 Days of Bold’ and ladies and gentlmen it is wonderful.

I shall forever be grateful to Tess. I even refer back to it if i find myself slipping a little. it is like a life persever that keeps you afloat until you can swim with the sharks.

Thanks to the 2 of you, You did put a smile on my face. By the way ladies and gentlemen the 99 dollars is the greatest investment you can make for yourself. You won’t even have to go by those expensive clothes, because you will know you are fine with just who and what you are.
have a great day ladies.

Debbie recently posted…Are You A Father Or A Sperm Donor?

Tess The Bold Life June 13, 2013 at 5:13 am

You’re my biggest fan. I’m grateful for your support and lovely words. xo
Tess The Bold Life recently posted…WTF: Working Through Fear

Debbie June 13, 2013 at 8:45 pm

You make it easy having taken your course. You are a very real person. And very understanding.
Debbie recently posted…Are You A Father Or A Sperm Donor?

Vidya Sury June 13, 2013 at 9:10 am

Debbie, you are absolutely right. I consider Tess’s course a lifetime investment in self, something many of us miss doing as we get caught up with all our other stuff.

What I best like about Tess is her no-fluff, no-nonsense way of getting things across. Directly touching the heart and nudging one to take action.

Hugs, Debbie! Love you. I was thrilled to see your testimonial for the course!!
Vidya Sury recently posted…You Are Good Enough. Overcome Self-doubt

Debbie June 13, 2013 at 8:48 pm

You are right, her no nonsense way of teaching. Now i am not scared to be me and let it shine. She is a jewel in the real world.

You have a great day and weekend.
Debbie recently posted…Are You A Father Or A Sperm Donor?

Tess The Bold Life June 13, 2013 at 9:57 pm

I think I’m acting as your mirror right now. Remember you spot it you got it…especially the good stuff. xo
Tess The Bold Life recently posted…WTF: Working Through Fear

Tess The Bold Life June 13, 2013 at 9:57 pm

Thanks so much for singing my praises. You’re the best. Just like me;))
Tess The Bold Life recently posted…WTF: Working Through Fear

Sebastian Aiden Daniels June 12, 2013 at 10:38 pm

Vidya you are awesome. I really enjoyed this post. It reminded me of an Adam Sandler movie called The Waterboy. There is a character in it that says, “YOU CAN DO IT!”

When fears comes invite it in. Say to it you are welcome. Come sit with me, you don’t control me.

It is always refreshing to hear that I am not alone in the let’s beat myself up train : D.

You are worthy Vidya.

Tess The Bold Life June 13, 2013 at 5:14 am

I never saw that movie! It sounds like a good one. I appreciate your words of wisdom. Not gonna let fear control me. Nope!
Tess The Bold Life recently posted…WTF: Working Through Fear

Vidya Sury June 13, 2013 at 9:13 am

“Awesome” just about sums up Tess, Sebastian. I have a feeling I saw that movie…but a while ago….oh I remember – Kathy Bates is his Mom. That was one enjoyable movie! 😀 Now you’ve made me want to watch it again! Adam Sandler portrays his role very well!

🙂 That beat-myself-up train has a tendency to whizz by – it is up to us to put our hands out and stop it or ignore it. I have learned the power of choice. I mean, think of voluntarily wanting to feel bad, eh?

Hugs! WE are worthy, Seb.
Vidya Sury recently posted…You Are Good Enough. Overcome Self-doubt

Sebastian Aiden Daniels June 14, 2013 at 3:23 am

: D.

Voluntarily feeling bad… HAHAHA.. I don’t know why but that statement made me laugh and smile. For the longest time I always felt I didn’t have a choice in my feelings, but I know now that in the long run I do.

We in the end decide how others and events affect us.

Have a beautiful weekend.

rachid June 13, 2013 at 2:46 am

Hi Vidya , Great post I really enjoyed it
I think feeling doubtful simply comes from believing your old limiting and self judgmental thoughts. When you think and believe fearful thoughts, you only limit yourself and project your story of fear into the world.
rachid recently posted…100 Impossible Quotes With Pictures To Inspire You To Challenge And Conquer The Impossible (Part 7 of 10)

Vidya Sury June 13, 2013 at 9:16 am

Hi Rachid! It is far too easy to be negative and it takes conscious effort to be positive and believe good things. I remember, as a little girl I asked my Mom why people were always eager to listen to gossip and mean things about someone….but seemed less interested to hear something good about someone. Mom smiled and said it was the way of the world…and that I had the choice to be like them, or not. I am now a pro at picking the silver lining and focusing on the positive – and that includes nurturing myself.

Thank you Rachid, for your insight. Your “100 impossible quotes” series is quite a compilation!
Vidya Sury recently posted…You Are Good Enough. Overcome Self-doubt

Tess The Bold Life June 13, 2013 at 9:58 pm

You’re absolutely right. However, I still need to be reminded especially when I get off track. Thanks!
Tess The Bold Life recently posted…WTF: Working Through Fear

Eric West June 13, 2013 at 2:51 am

I am good enough is a great mantra. So often other people want to put us down, we would do well to remind ourselves that we are good enough.

Vidya Sury June 13, 2013 at 9:18 am

It is, Eric! And just believing it takes care of so many issues! And yes, people are quite adept at telling someone they can’t do it…or sowing doubts in their mind. Finally, it is our choice to shut that out….or not. 🙂 Thank you for coming by! I appreciate it!
Vidya Sury recently posted…You Are Good Enough. Overcome Self-doubt

Tess The Bold Life June 13, 2013 at 9:59 pm

You’re good enough, Eric!!! This is your reminder.
Tess The Bold Life recently posted…WTF: Working Through Fear

My Inner Chick June 13, 2013 at 5:24 am

•Be authentic and hold yourself accountable*

Love that one! X
My Inner Chick recently posted…9 Ways To Kick Blog Ass

Vidya Sury June 13, 2013 at 9:19 am

Me too, Kim! When we take responsibility, nothing can touch us.

Love you more than the fifty parrots I saw yesterday evening on my terrace, dancing and fluttering around and making my heart sing!
Vidya Sury recently posted…Acing The Learning Curve And Collecting Smiles

Tess The Bold Life June 13, 2013 at 9:59 pm

Thanks, I’m glad you stopped by and shared.
Tess The Bold Life recently posted…WTF: Working Through Fear

Evelyn Lim June 13, 2013 at 2:41 pm

Vidya, “I am good enough” is certainly a great mantra. You are very lucky to have your mother as a mentor.

Excellent message, Tess. It is so important to set aside self-doubt and embrace ourselves. And yes, we don’t have to be perfect! We are already good enough!
Evelyn Lim recently posted…10 Mental Viruses that Obstruct Your Business Success

Tess The Bold Life June 13, 2013 at 10:00 pm

Haven’t seen or heard from you in a while. I hope all is well in your world. xo

Lori Gosselin June 13, 2013 at 9:35 pm

Hi Tess, Hi Vidya, Hi Everyone!
This is an intriguing topic and as I read I can’t help but wonder where this idea originated – that we are NOT enough! Can we change a thing Tess before we understand it? I don’t know.
Lori Gosselin recently posted…Are You Stubborn?

Tess The Bold Life June 13, 2013 at 10:02 pm

Hi Lori,
That’s a great question. I think we have different levels of believing we’re good enough. I wanted to be a good enough mother so I quit smoking when I was 27. I wanted to be a good enough wife so I went to marital therapy. On some level I thought I was good enough or I wouldn’t have been able to make those changes so young.

Sometimes I still forget that I’m good enough.

Elle June 14, 2013 at 1:22 am

Thanks for the reminder Tess of how great everyone truly is and thanks Vidya for sharing.

I’m a huge advocate for Tess’s 30 Days of Bold…can’t recommend it highly enough. Wherever you think you are in life, take it, you’ll be amazed.

Elle recently posted…The Three Pillars Of Starting Over

Mary Stephenson June 14, 2013 at 2:51 am

Hi Tess and Vidya,

It is a hard thing to swallow when we come to face the fact we are not as perfect as we assumed we were or the fact that we don’t have to become stagnate because we can’t be perfect. How many of us don’t do something because we fear we can’t do it right or that others may not think we are so great after all. It is much easier not to try, than to try and fail. We may have to lose that great opinion of ourselves that we once had. Taking responsibility for ourselves without excuses is a hard thing to do, especially when it is so much easier to point the finger at someone else’s shortcomings and that is why we are not further ahead in life.

Very good list to give us the strength to not opt-out of living our dreams.

Mary Stephenson recently posted…The Roaring of Thunder

Oleg June 14, 2013 at 5:39 pm

Hi Vidya!

Are You Indian? Are You traveler? Have You ever been in Europe… for exemple – in Poland? 🙂

(sorry for my poor English, but my native language is Polish)

You must see my beautiful country, old castles, amazing landscapes, delicious food, great people… and other more 🙂 if You want know more about Poland let type EPIC POLAND in search-box on Facebook 🙂

And if You were ever in Poland, in Wroclaw city, I can help You 🙂

Greetings from Poland!

Shail June 14, 2013 at 7:08 pm

Very interesting read, Vidya. Thanks for sharing. 🙂
Shail recently posted…Foto Friday 52: How to swallow a worm

Josh June 14, 2013 at 7:44 pm

Wise words and good for not just today but any day.
Josh recently posted…Sometimes Murder Is Funny…Right


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